tuesday december 5 2006

No presents. I feel sad.
It's the same as no presents at christmas, for people in other countries.

In the letter of the replacement principal for the meeting of next tuesday was only the time, no subject.
Jim has talked with him once before, and he says it's a rather arrogant man.
Well, I won't go to a meeting to be called a bad mother.
I don't think his intent is to make things better for Thami. He rejected our idea of having the educationalist present.
She's at school to make and implement treatment plans... IEP's are they called in america, as I understand.

The last years I've learned not to rush to school when something is the matter. I don't like all those heated emotions.
It also gives me plenty of time to prepare and foresee things.

Right know I'm writing a kind of manual about kids like Thami and I hope it'll be finished in time to hand it to that pricipal and the mentor.

My reaction to the fact that that teacher of Thami refused him entrance to the lesson was OK.
Today Thami was invited for a talk and he promised his dad on the phone to keep his mouth shut...
I can't believe he will. LOL!

He is right when he says none cared and cares about his emotions.
Those teachers are fighting for one bit of respect, and they can get it free on a platter of they would only try to understand what talking means to someone who has the kind of ADHD and memoryproblems Thami has.
They keep talking and talking, and je just gets stuck at the first two lines and can't process their info as fast as they throw it on him.

I got a mail from the mentor, complaining that Thami didn't follow the rules.

Well, I'm a kind of tired of this man.
I don't like "an eye for an eye...", but in this case I feel like giving no reply at all but mailing him I've received his mail.
He says that he wants to clear this between us before the meeting of next week.. but I don't feel the problems with Thami stand between us.
The attitude of this mentor stands between us. He doesn't know what ADHD truly means. And what's the biggest problem: he thinks he knows best....
That's the real problem, you know. I do!! LOL!

So when Thami comes home I'll listen well, try to calm his emotions, and then stuff all this toodoo behind the couch.
Even though we don't expect any sinterklaaspresents, nor the real Sinterklaas to visit us, we can have a pleasant evening.

But oh...how I wish a sinterklaas for myself. A warm man, that cares for my children and who wants to hug me...
Because a hug once in a while... I miss it.

monday december 4 2006

Another day full of commotion.
It started with finding out I'd won at one of the Whuddle world clubs.
Woohoo!!!
I've won WhuddleWorld Money, which won't buy real bread, but will enable me to take part in the Christmasfun a bit more.
I consider myself very lucky, because there are plenty of others that had the same chance.

Then Jim called. Thami had called him that the teacher he had problems with has refused to allow him to attend.

Well..I was lucky not to fly too high because of winning, because my landing on my feet could have been a lot harder. LOL!

I have dealt with this before, when we had problems with Nyo when he was 11. But that was a different schoollevel.

I've mailed the infomail of the government and got a very quick reply. Which was as I thought. The law doesn't allow this if there's no information the the parents and board.
So I informed the board myself. And also said we could talk about this at the same meeting that already should have been planned by them.

Problem is the person of the board doesn't like Thami at all...
And as it's the same person who wanted to hush up the attack on him, I don't think he likes us either.

My request to have one of the educationalists to attend the meeting, was denied. Which means they don't want the best for Thami, but want to overpower us.
It's written a bit harsh, but I know it comes down to that.
Otherwise the problems would have been settled a long time ago.

Then I mailed the contactperson with the government with the rest of the problems, stating that I had doubt about the outcome of the meeting and on what grounds.
It's good for thei filekeeping. LOL!

After that I dressed up. Bit of lipstick, and went with Lars to the police.
There were quite some people waiting to talk, but he asked us what we came for and handled matters at the desk.
We said they were still threatening to hurt Lars, they were signalled at school every day, asking for Lars.
Also told one of the boys bycicles home with them to hear them out, and that we have his comments on MSN..copied into a mail.

So he wants the mail and informed us there was another issue brought under the attention of the police, presumably the same group. And that they worked on it with several people, but that it takes time.
We said we were trying quietly to get people who have been attacked by the same group to contact the police.

Then I informed him Lars was at home and not at school, because I don't want him subject of another attack.

He agreed with me.

Good... of there are problems with the law because Lars is not attending,I can say the police and we agreed on this.
Phew!!

We agreed with school they'll send work for him, so maybe we can take this as a chance to improve his results.

I feel very stressed by all this, this is not what I intended for december.

sunday december 3 2006

I still feel it's strange that people wish me happy christmas and new year.
I should be used to it by now, but it doesn't sink in well before Sinterklaas is over.
The girls finished the presents for school. So that's done.
They celebrate tomorrow.
Sinterklaas will visit the school, and the little children who still believe have a seperate celebration in the classroom following his arrival, that kids at the age of the girls.
The girls pulled names at random, so they make one present and get one.

I still feel sad we're not having presents at home this year.
I long for the days we had...

Lars was able to get some people talking over MSN about the attack on him last week.
Each day that group of boys is waiting for him.
Classmates talked about it on MSN, and he has copied it all in a mail that will go to school and, if wanted by them, to the police.
I feel sick about it.

He's afraid to go to school, and he's right in being so.

Tomorrow after the rest has gone to school, we'll go to the police and try to find a good solution.

It's a pity in this country a streetorder needs far more than in some other countries.
So he needs to have either police protection or he stays at home and studies here.

I've never dealt with issues like this.
It frightens me like hell.

saturday december 2 2006

We left perfectly on time to the bagpipelessons.
We had time to enjoy the last part of autumn. Almost all the red and yellow on the ground had coloured into brown now, but there's still yellow and a bit of red at the trees.

The girls got lesson from my former teacher. They already adore him.
There are only three children left of the group that has started. Which makes it almost a private lesson.

We waited for our teacher, but I guess the back-up system doesn't work in that group.
One of the pupils decided to take the part of the leader.
Let's say he has to learn a lot, including keeping his own opinion from the tabel.

I already felt before he doesn't like me, and that feeling grew during the lesson.

I've played the whistle and flute a lot and when I'm tired at the lesson my fingers switch towards the flute position and I play the flute-setting.
This results in different tones, because on the bagpipechanter there's a different fingersetting.
The best way to deal with it is stopping, listening to the rest and after a break of a couple of minutes start anew.
The guy didn't understand it, and told me he was disappointed I didn't try harder. I just told him I knew what and how to play, and I wanted the lesson to go on with someone else.
Ofcourse he thought I was embarrassed by other people looking at my fingers but I wasn't.
I felt very uncomfortable by the way he was dealing with me.

Before I have felt that he looked down on me, and I don't like that. Especially because he doesn't know me at all.

Later during the lesson we switched to another number and I played it just like that. In fact I was the only one who could play it without mistakes and with the feel of dance.
he grumbled something and then said: "That's OK", in such a tone that one of the others winked at me. The guy is plain jealous.

Well, I can't handle people looking doen on me, but I can handle with plain jealousy. LOL!
Maybe he's one of those guys who thinks a woman needs to cook and clean.
Well, that's a pity for him.

Now I think of it...:
Those who know me a long time know I have had problems in the past with a treasurer. Well, this guy is a treasurer too. LOL!

But he can also have to deal with other feelings.
We started about a year later than his group, and we're now at almost equal level. His son joined our group the last months and we brought him with us into the group.

Well, we'll see how big a threat we are when the bagpipes have arrived.
He already has one and he can play them a bit.

After the lesson I took some time to listen to the contestband. Wow, they're so good!
And I talked a bit with my former teacher.

The rest of the time it was rather quiet at home.
I needed that.